Fighting the Good Fight?

Ugh. I don't know what to do anymore. I don't even have time to blog. This is where I put my heart's thoughts and it's so distressed right now I don't know if I want to feel for fear of letting lose a demon. I'm getting kicked all over the place right now regarding Scarlett's care. You can join my Facebook page under Scarlett's Syndrome  for more information about our battles. That's the space reserved for my head and day to day stuff. I try to keep my head and heart separate. It's the only way to function.

My head is pounding and my heart is racing. I can't understand why this drama keeps happening! Why am I getting support only to have it taken away? And the reason? Because Scarlett is under 19 years old. Yeah, that's right. I wonder how the good ol' people who drafted the Home Support Guide for Children feel about that? They are, after all, the Canadian Healthcare Association so I'm assuming that they know their sh*t. Hey, they wrote the book on it haha!

I am floored. This is wrong. Home Support came to me and now they are telling me I can't have them. Whaaaa?!?!?! All I want is a few hours each day so I can get groceries or spend time with my kids or take a shower or make blended food. It's not like I'm going out with the girls drinking. I get nervous taking my migraine meds because they make me woozy and I can't afford to be off key at any moment with Scarlett.

I need this! Last time I checked, I still lived in Canada. When did a mother have to BEG continuously for help concerning her daughter's care? If I have a break down or my sleep deprivation causes a terrible accident, not only will I be hospitalized but so will my daughter. At a huge expense to my fellow taxpayers. I'm trying to be preventative and maintain and all I'm hearing is no. If I didn't need this I wouldn't be fighting for it. Do I like having excess people in my home? Squashing those magic times or taking peeks into our emotional events? No. Would you? But it's the lesser of the two evils. Privacy equals isolation for Scarlett and myself and a complete breakdown. Personnel in my home take away my private moments but at least it creates stability where there needs to be.

What to do to keep this going? Suggestions? Anyone want to do this for me because I have other things to do like love my kids and keep them going.